God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
The last several months have been frustrating at best as I have been dealing with my first serious running-related injury. In general, I've handled the situation relatively well. I (re)learned how to bike and swim, I've seen various doctors and physical therapists, and I've spent a lot of extra time stretching, icing, and doing various strengthening exercises. I'd been seeing progress, albeit slow, and had even starting running again, 2-3 miles at a time. But yesterday, after a 3 mile run, I felt that familiar painful pull from whatever it is that's f-ed up in my ankle, and I nearly lost it. It felt like all of the hard work I've done over the past few months, all of the money spent treating this, all of the rest I've taken... was just crashing down on me. I felt overwhelmingly sad and lethargic. I moped around all day, stared blankly at my computer screen at work, ignored phone calls, ate like there was no tomorrow, and just generally felt really, really badly for myself.
Well, as I always say, a good night's rest can cure anything. I woke up today, still sad, but more refreshed and ready to grab life by the reigns and take charge of what I can control. (Thus, the serenity prayer).
After a small cup of coffee, I pushed myself out the door and rode my bike 18 miles. It wasn't easy to convince myself to gear up (because honestly, biking feels like a huge hassle to me most of the time), but once I was out there, I could feel my mood elevating immediately. Plus I was treated to this fantastic view!
So, after a lovely start to my day, I'm focusing on two things: 1) accepting that I'm injured and will not be racing in Europe, and 2) taking the necessary steps to figure out exactly what is wrong because, believe it or not, I still don't actually know what's up with my ankle! As of right now my doctor is working with my insurance company on authorization for an MRI, which should tell me exactly what's wrong and hopefully then how to effectively treat it. That's all I can do for right now.
In the meantime, I keep reminding myself that my life could be a lot worse. I've got it really, really good!
